Along the Road to Nowhere-Cut Scene from Chapter Three
Earlier I mentioned that there was a part that got cut from Chapter Three. Well, I found it.
It's longer than I remembered. Instead of just a short scene, it's the length of a whole chapter. Even weirder, the part that I cut includes a pretty important plot point: the scene where Nervous has Loki's kid. Why I didn't just skip to that part instead of cutting it out, I don't know. It probably has to do with the fact that I sucked at writing.
However, I have an idea of why I cut the rest of this section. In the chapters that actually made the final cut, I wrote Nervous as if he were some sweet innocent thing who could do no wrong (conveniently ignoring his utter lack of nice points in-game). It seems as if my past self intended to make him seem like the one character who wasn't a walking pile of inconsistency and horribleness.
Turns out, he's right up there with the rest of them, or would have been if I'd kept this chapter in.
I also found their altered character bios, so I'll include those too.
I think I'll leave the sporking off of this chapter. It sort of interrupted the flow of the story, and I really don't even know what to write because this section is so WTF.
Main Character Bios:
-No matter what happens, Pascal believes there is a logical explanation for everything—except Loki Beaker. He believes that Loki Beaker is the spawn of Satan. In his free time, he practices home psychoanalysis, collects conspiracy theories, and tries to figure out ways to defeat his youngest brother in a duel.
-Serious and exact, Vidcund strives to fit the universe into a nice tidy package that he can insert into his rectum. He has an unnatural fondness for African violets and his brothers.
-Not as studious as his older brothers, Lazlo got his degree in Phrenology. He likes to call phone psychics and spends hours trying to bend forks with his mind. His hobbies include pimping and fighting Pascal.
-As soon as he perfects his latest invention, Loki is sure to get the recognition he knows he deserves and make those Curious brothers look like idiots. In the meantime, he keeps himself busy by trying to build a nuclear reactor out of common household items and screwing the test subject.
-Nervous’s hobbies include twitching, blinking, opening the gaping maw of hell, and having babies.
-Circe knows 238 ways to make someone scream and none of them are nice. She enjoys taxidermy, collecting coat hangers (and beating Loki and Nervous with the wire ones), and summoning Satan for more money.
Chapter 3.5 [It would probably have gone between chapters three and four.]
Over the next few days, it would seem as though Nervous did become the butthole Circe and Loki had always wished him to be.
"Say, Loki," he said one day, after crop-dusting the dining table, "Circe kind of totally sucks. Like, a lot."
Loki struggled to clear the fart fumes from his nose. Considering its size, this was no small task. "Tell me something I don't know."
Nervous fanned the air behind his ass. "Did you maybe think about doing something about it?"
Loki pondered this while Nervous licked his plate clean. Again, no easy feat, as Nervous was dragging his oh-so-flexible, pink, hot and moist tongue over the white plastic. Loki's blood was draining from one head to the other so fast, he nearly fell off his chair. "What could I do?" Loki breathed, struggling to stay upright.
"You could do me," Nervous said.
Loki pondered some more. What a novel concept.
From then on, when Circe was away, the boys would play.
"Must we do it right here? On Circe's very expensive couch without the slipcover?" Loki asked.
Nervous snickered. "Worry about your own slipcover. You can't knock up a couch. I checked."
Of course, they had to keep up the "obedient husband and test subject" act.
"Is that a wrinkle on my couch?" Circe asked as she went to her closet of wire coat hangers. "And what have you been doing with Nervous all night?"
"Nothing, dear. He's just tired from all our experiments," Loki answered.
"Lovely." Circe turned back to the hangers. "Now which one should I use on them tonight?"
Loki looked over at Nervous seemingly faking an Aspiration failure and twirled his finger around his ear.
He regretted that action when he felt the crotch of his pants get tighter. He almost blew their cover--and his load.
"Don't look at his butt, don't look at his butt."
However, for all his trash-talk and rude antics, Nervous was sort of regretting his behavior.
"Do I really want to break up their marriage? I mean it's not a particularly good one, but what do I know? I can't even get laid by Pascal, and he actually likes me. Who am I to break up their family, and at the same time, want one of my own?"
This sentiment didn't last long.
"What's that on your shirt?" Circe asked, pointing at Nervous's chest.
"Where?" Nervous looked down. Circe flicked his nose, hard.
"Oh my god! You actually fell for that!" Circe shrieked with laughter. "Your contribution to science won't be as a surgeon."
Nervous glared. "Oh, you got jokes, bitch?"
"Look at me, making jokes you'll never get. Really, I don't know what Pascal sees in you, but he sure doesn't keep you around for your brains, " Circe ignored his mutterings and went on. "Should I be testing you for syphilis as well? That would explain a lot."
Nervous saw Loki enter the room and sit down on the couch, so he refrained from lashing out.
"In fact, I don't think you'd really miss a few skill points." Circe whipped out her Simvac, aimed it at Nervous and turned it on full blast.
"Godammit. I just learned how to make spaghetti," Nervous thought.
Nervous was also getting blamed for some of Circe's other activities.
"Quit watching me piss!" Vidcund shoved Nervous.
"Why the hell would I want to see that?" Nervous shoved back.
Nervous tried to confront Circe about this, to no avail.
"Circe, tell your crazy ex-boytoy I don't wanna see his dick."
"Is that what that was? Hmm. Our telescope's magnifying lens must be broken."
"Lady, your brain must be broken."
Circe was unfazed. "At least I have a brain. One that's not fried by electroshock therapy and whatever crack you seem to have smoked lately." She glanced down at Nervous's shaking fists. "Do your hands shake like that when you're jerking Pascal off? Do you think that could be why he hasn't called you lately?"
"You know what?" Nervous thought. "Fuck your marriage. Fuck your experiments, fuck your hangers, and fuck your damn couch."
"Also your husband. That I will do gladly."
The feeling was mutual.
Loki fanned the air to take in all of Nervous's heady scent. He made a mental note to sniff around in Nervous's hamper later on.
Circe was busy with more important matters than supervising her husband.
Circe made a face behind the telescope. "So that's why Vidcund's lost interest in me. That wasn't information I really needed to know."
Nervous stomped outside. "Are you watching Vidcund again, you pervert?"
Circe smiled tightly at Nervous. "I think we might have gotten off on the wrong foot today. How about we call a truce?" She reached out and shook Nervous's hand.
If Nervous didn't already have a Mohawk, his hair would be standing on end from the electric shock.
Circe marveled at her palm. "My taser glove works perfectly! Now let's test it on Loki."
Nervous twitched even more than usual, then fell on his face.
To add insult to injury, he continued to get blamed for Circe's telescope habits.
"What did I tell you about watching me on the toilet?" Vidcund shoved Nervous.
"I told you, I don't do that shit!" Nervous shoved back.
Circe did not thank Nervous for taking the fall for her.
So Nervous screwed Loki on the couch that night and figured they were even.
The next day, Circe remembered she had a blonder, more fun toy to play with.
"Just in time for the ten o' clock show," Circe snickered into her telescope.
Unfortunately for her, Vidcund had gotten wise to her "blame Nervous" scheme.
"Quit looking at me naked!" Vidcund shouted, poking Circe.
"I'm not looking at your naked body, I'm just looking at Uranus," Circe shot back. "For science reasons."
Vidcund was not amused. "Why don't you stare at the stars instead of my moon?"
Circe rolled her eyes. "Sorry, it'll never happen again."
"Hmph." Vidcund turned and stomped off the lot.
Circe turned back to the telescope. "Heh, heh. Sucker."
Vidcund was certainly getting his workout that day. "What the hell is your problem?"
Circe shoved back. "Can I help it if I like Ass-trology?"
Vidcund made an incoherent noise of frustration and left the lot.
Circe rolled her eyes. "Whatever, screw him." She turned to the other Sim walking down the sidewalk "Hey, Crystal, let me tell you about my giant sacks...of money."
Crystal Vu practically swooned. "Oh, Circe! I love it when you talk dirty to me."
When Circe got bored with talking about money (everyone was surprised that was possible), she went back inside to run a few experiments.
No response, or so it seemed, as Circe could not see Nervous's finger from her position.
"Nervous, get your dumb ass up here or that will be all that's left of you by the end of this week."
As she proceeded with the experiments, Circe wrote her observations in her notes. "Subject does not respond well to electrical shocks."
"No shit, sherlock!" Nervous hollered from the floor.
After he stopped convulsing, Nervous got up and cursed the gods. "All right. Time to pull out the big guns."
That night, he and Loki did their Woohoo right in Circe's bed.
Loki's thoughts were all on Nervous. "I must be softening up," he thought. He adjusted his underwear. "No, actually I'm not."
Circe didn't seem to be softening up anytime soon.
So as a peace offering, Nervous decided to help her break in her new couch.
With Loki's butt.
However, he didn't retaliate too hard this time. Circe wasn't the only one looking at Vidcund.
"Why is Lazlo getting in the shower with Vidcund?" Nervous thought. He zoomed in, then jumped back from the telescope in shock. "Oh...I hope Pascal isn't in on this."
When Vidcund ran in for the slapfest, Nervous was ready for him.
"You're seriously fucked up, you know that, Curious?"
"At least I'm not a twitchy lab-wrecker."
Vidcund had to settle for giving a bitchy greeting to Circe instead of an angry lecture.
Soon, Nervous and Loki discovered that the cactus in the front yard wasn't the only thing that got fertilized a few nights ago.
"Loki, remember how our condom had that hole in it?"
Loki stopped turning pages in his book. He turned the words over in his head. He tilted his head to make the process easier. He got distracted by the sensation of his neck muscles flexing and his brain cells rubbing themselves together. He almost forgot what Nervous was talking about.
By the time Loki realized that Nervous was pregnant, Nervous had left the table.
Nervous realized it all over the downstairs toilet. Then the upstairs toilet, when he went to collect his underwear from Loki's room.
Circe sucked his aspiration points dry for puking all over their bathroom, but it was totally worth it.
Nervous soon gave birth to a boy he named Damien. Loki and, surprisingly, Circe cheered.
"Aren't you just the cutest little thing in the Underworld!" Nervous cooed at his spawn. Damien's eyes flashed red, but Nervous was too busy rubbing his nose against the baby's face to notice.
Loki was also otherwise occupied, with Nervous's lower body to be specific.
"Silly daddy. He knows it'd be like throwing a hot dog down a mineshaft right now," Nervous went on, making Circe's ears bleed with his high voice.
Damien appeared not to hear Nervous and instead focused intensely on Circe.
Nervous spent a lot of time caring for Damien. He'd always wanted his own family.
Circe continued to be oblivious to anything that wasn't financial.
Damien may have been conceived through an act of revenge, but that didn't stop Nervous from loving him.
Even Loki helped with the childcare. Like, once.
However, as Damien became a toddler, he began to get a little more difficult. Whenever Nervous went to feed Damien, he noticed the child's tiny teeth were a little more pointy than the average Sim's.
And the minute he taught Damien to talk, Damien started saying the strangest things. Like, "The blood of Simkind shall become a great shower upon our house," and "I wish to dine on the entrails of the flame-headed one."
Nervous could usually calm him down with a warm bottle and cuddle, but it was still worrying.
What was even more worrying was that Circe was onto them.
"If you're going to hump the test subject, at least wait until I turn around!" Circe yelled as she slapped Loki.
"But...I thought you couldn't see without your glasses."
Nervous sat on the sidelines, watching. "Maybe if you poked him with something other than those wire hangers, you wouldn't be in this mess," he suggested.
It wasn't long before Circe and Nervous fought.
"Git 'er, Nervous!" Loki cheered.
"You're supposed to be on my side, jackass!" Circe shouted back. She won the fight without his stupid cheering, anyway.
After the fight, Nervous went upstairs to cry like a bitch. Loki came up to comfort him.
"Hi, cheaters! I can see your asses in the bed."
Loki and Nervous pretended not to hear.
Circe didn't like being ignored.
Not at all.
So the only thing they could really do was get out.
And that was the last order they'd follow from Circe.